Okay, freak show. As you know, I work in the department that is in charge of circulation for all the magazines. Friday we had the departmental "achievement awards." Now, I knew that they'd be fairly odd. Normal companies, you coerce everyone into a conference room, someone drones on for 45 minutes, and you leave. Not my company. My third day here, back in 2002, we had this award ceremony. I was a little alarmed to walk out of the elevator bank and be accosted by actors masquarading as papparazzi. So I was slightly prepared.

This year, though, takes the cake for bizarreness. This year, I walked out of the elevator, and was accosted by...superheros. A man in drag playing Lois Lane, Superman, Batman, Wonderwoman, Catwoman, and some other people I didn't recognize. Thank God I was early and noone was in the room when I arrived, because I ended up being filmed as I answered questions about who my favorite superhero is. My image was projected on two big screens. What does all this have to do with magazine circulation? Hell if I know.

The awards themselves were pretty dry. The best part was the music that they chose to play for each group that won (14 awards in total). My poor boss got "Believe it or not, I'm floating on air, never thought I could be so free...." My favorite was the IT award, though. These poor men (mid-thirties to late forties, balding, generally of Eastern European descent) go marching up to the awards dias to the theme song from "Queer Eye for the Straight Guy." You know, "Things Just Keep Getting Better?" I almost choked, I was trying so hard not to laugh. Fairly certain none of them knew why I was choking, though.

After the awards the superheros continued to accost us, but at least they gave us ice cream.

And that, folks, is just one reason why I believe my office is a freak show. Someone had to PLAN and APPROVE and PAY FOR this thing!